8 Common Sense TIPS for Parents:
How YOU can make your child SAFE!
1. Provide positive information that is based on truth, not myths. This instills the value of honesty and openness and shows you trust your children to know the facts. Read the FACTS vs.MYTHS section on this web site.
2. Teach appropriate boundaries. Tell them under no circumstances is ANYONE, family member, friend, trusted authority figure, etc. allowed to touch them inappropriately or talk to them in an inappropriate manner. Teach them to say the following:
"I know what you are trying to do is wrong, and if you continue, I WILL tell my parents, the police or someone who will listen and you will go to jail."
3. Tell them that they should not have any secrets from you and that you will never blame them for something an adult does to them. Also, teach them to respect themselves and others. Boys should respect girls and girls should respect boys. When children respect themselves, it is easy for them to respect others.
4. Have them walk in groups of three or more to school, or the playground, or to friend’s house. Identify SAFE places for them and tell them to scream and run to the nearest SAFE place, when approached by a stranger.
5. If a sex offender moves in to the neighborhood. Find out what the charge was, most times, you will find out it was not an offense against a child. Go and talk to the person. Remember, some people are falsely accused and are pressured into taking a plea bargain. If they admit wrongdoing, listen for indicators they have been in treatment and have complied with all the terms of the court. Likewise, listen for indicators they are in denial, or are minimizing or rationalizing; these are typically red flags of more serious problems. If they live alone, find out what their support mechanism is. Point them to our SO-Solutions Help page.
6. If necessary, tell you children to walk on the other side of the street, or find another route to their friends house, tell them to inform you or another parent if the offender approaches them. Don't instill fear in your children, this will NOT make them safe, it will only add to childhood insecurities. Use common sense and your children will use common sense as well.
7. Keep your child's computer in a common area of the house, NOT in their bedroom. While we recommend computer monitoring programs to help, don't rely on them exclusively, most children are computer savvy enough to defeat these programs. Instead, set ground rules and reasonable expectations for Internet usage and monitor your child's computer usage. Make sure children NEVER give out, or post personal information. Do NOT allow your child's friends to access your computer without your knowledge and make sure they are aware of your rules. Remember, ONLY YOU, AS A PARENT, can insure your child's safety online.
8. Use what you have learned here to educate family members, and other parents; fear mongering will not protect anyone's child and will only lead them to mistrust people.

LINKS
(Note: Clicking the link below will take you to a new web site, use your browser back arrow to return to this page.)
One of the biggest myths, the most outrageous lie, told by politicians and the mainstream media concerns the recidivism of sex offenders. Media personalities like Bill O’Rilley, Nancy Grace, and Glenn Beck quote up to 95 percent recidivism. In turn, politicians like Georgia’s Jerry Keen and Eric Johnson, or bureaucrats like AG (I’ve never prosecuted a case in court) Alberto Gonzalez use these myths, and the public buys off, without even questioning the absurdity of them.
When the sex offender registry and proximity legislation was first enacted, there was very little research to substantiate, either way, the recidivism of sex offenders. However, that was over a decade ago. We now have many studies to rely on for facts. The graph on the right shows statistics drawn from the
The recidivism rate is lower when looking at only the offenders who have completed a program of individual and group therapy. This is due to the success of cognitive therapy in helping these individuals understand victim empathy, accepting responsibility, and adapting assertiveness skills. The fact is, ex-convicts with an original non-sex offense charge are 86% more likely to commit a sex offence than an offender who successfully completed a therapy program.
At the end of the day, the Restorative justice model works far better than retributive justice does and it is by far more cost effective for society. An offender in therapy costs taxpayers around $5,000 per year. An incarcerated offender, with a wife and two children will cost taxpayers around $48,000 per year, including public support for the family. An offender in therapy, holding down a job, adds not only to his stability, it adds revenue to the public treasury. Common sense dictates we adopt Restorative justice in place of retributive justice.
The following excerpts are a compilation of quotes from experts in Constitutional Law, Law Enforcement, and Psychology, regarding the effectiveness of proximity (residency restrictions) and registration laws.
“Therapy works for these people. Let them be punished for their crimes, let them out and let them get on with their lives. Let them work. Let them have stable homes and families and let them live in peace. Harassing them, making them move and continually punishing them does far more harm than good. A sex offender in therapy with a job and a place to live is less of a threat than one that is constantly harassed.”
-- Robert Shilling, Detective, Crimes Against Children Division, / Seattle, WA
“If the 2,000-foot rule had been in effect 10 years ago, I can’t think of a single case from our files that would have been any different.”
-- Sgt. Bryce Smith, Sex Offender Registry Officer, / Scott County, Iowa
“What you’re doing is pushing people more underground, pushing them away from treatment and pushing them away from monitoring, you’re really not improving the safety, but you are giving people a false sense of safety.”
-- John Gruber, Executive Director of the Association for the Treatment of Sexual Abusers
“We went from knowing where about 90 percent of them were. We’re lucky if we know where 50 to 55 percent of them are now...the law created an atmosphere that these individuals can’t find a place to live.”
-- Sheriff Don Zeller, / Linn County, Iowa
“When I talk with friends, colleagues and neighbors regarding this law, the first reaction is that we must do everything we can to protect our children. Absolutely. But I am afraid this statute gives parents and communities a false sense of protection against crimes that most often occur not at school bus stops, but where children are in the greatest danger: their own homes.”
“It may be time to do away with sex offender registration laws altogether. At the very least, the federal government should commission research to study the laws’ effectiveness. In the meantime, several changes should be made. States should differentiate between serious and non-serious offenders and only require registration of the most serious offenders. Next, public access to online sites should be dismantled, and registries should be kept at the local police stations. This would provide at least a minimal screening process to those seeking inquiries… Lastly, we should experiment with restorative justice models such as what has happened in Canada where sex offenders moving into a community meet with members of the community in a public forum facilitated by a trained mediator. This type of forum gives the community an opportunity to meet the offender face to face and express their concerns and for the offender to show the community that he is earnestly seeking to change his life.”
“Though laudable in their intent, there is little evidence that recently enacted housing policies achieve their stated goals of reducing recidivistic sexual violence. In fact, there is little research at all evaluating the effectiveness of these policies. Furthermore, these policies are not evidence-based in their development or implementation, as they tend to capture the widely heterogeneous group of sex offenders rather than utilize risk assessment technology to identify those who pose a high danger to public safety.”
-- Jill S. Levenson, Ph.D., Assistant Professor of Human Services, Lynn University
“The recent wave of sex offender legislation is based upon emotion and myths about sex offenders which are not supported by valid research or evidence. Legislation in this area should be based upon facts and valid evidence. The NACDL encourages criminal defense lawyers, prosecutors and legislators to oppose legislation based upon myth and public emotion. In doing so we can ensure both public safety and due process.”
-- Report of the Sex Offender Policy Task Force, National Association of Criminal Defense Lawyers
“I would rather have someone who has committed a sex offense be going to work every day, come home tired, have a sense of well-being that comes from having a regular paycheck and a safe home, as opposed to having a sex offender who has a lot of free time on his hands.”
-- Richard Hamill, President of the New York State Alliance of Sex Offender Service Providers
“The current law applies to too many offenders and I spend ‘way, way too much of my time’ trying to enforce it, I believe less than 10% of the state's 8,000 convicted sex offenders to be high-risk and is lobbying lawmakers to focus on them”
-- Sgt. Gary Stansill, Sex-crimes Unit / Tulsa Police Department
“What we're doing with sexual predator laws is creating or enlarging an exception to those constraints. We're saying the government can take away people's liberty ... based on a prediction that somebody might be dangerous in the future.”
-- Eric Janus, Vice Dean, William Mitchell College of Law
“The more cities choose to install these ordinances, the more ex-offenders will become an exile class, sex offenders are less likely to reoffend if they're allowed to reintegrate into society, to get a job, to establish stable roots, a support network, a home, by forcing these people to be refugees, politicians are essentially making their own citizens less safe.”
-- William Buckman, defense attorney and national sex offender policy expert
“The law was well-intentioned, but we don't see any evidence of a connection between where a person lives and where they might offend.”
-- Corwin R. Ritchie, Iowa County Attorneys Association
“We're not aware of any evidence that residency restrictions have prevented a child from being victimized.”
-- Carolyn Atwell-Davis, Director of Legislative Affairs, National Center for Missing and Exploited Children
“There is no evidence in
-- Minnesota Department of Corrections, ‘Level Three Sex Offenders Residential Placement Issues’ 2003 Report to the Legislature
“There is simply no evidence to suggest that residency restriction … will lead to decreases in recidivism. Rather, the evidence suggests mass migration to rural areas, decreasing their social stability and increasing their risk of recidivism [plus] a dramatic increase in offenders driven underground”
--
“Placing restrictions on the location of correctional supervised sex offender residences may not deter the sex offender from re-offending and should not be considered as a method to control sexual offending recidivism.”
-- Report on Safety Issues Raised by Living Arrangements for and Location of Sex Offenders in the Community; Colorado Department of Public Safety, Division of Criminal justice, Sex Offender Management Board
“Housing restrictions have passed in most localities with little resistance. Child safety is rightly the primary concern when sex offender restrictions are imposed. It seems to make sense that decreasing access to potential victims would be a feasible strategy to preventing sex crimes. There is no evidence, however, that such laws are effective in reducing recidivistic sexual violence. On the other hand, such laws aggravate the scarcity of housing options for sex offenders, forcing them out of metropolitan areas and farther away from the social support, employment opportunities, and social services that are known to aid offenders in successful community re-entry.”
--Sex offender residence restrictions. A Report to the
"The proliferation of these types of [residency] restrictions is making it more difficult for corrections to fulfill their mandate of helping offenders make a successful reentry into society."
-- Charles Olney, a research associate for the Center for Sex Offender Management, U.S. Justice Department)
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If you know of a good quote, please send it to me, I will include it here.

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